Loving Difficult People

I've been thinking lately about the concept of loving every person I meet, even people who are difficult or toxic.⠀
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You know the story: no matter how hard you try or how much love you throw at them, they are harmful to your well-being. But you’re hesitant to give up on them because love must be unconditional.⠀
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And sometimes they are so thoroughly rotten that you don't even want to try but you think it's part of being a spiritual person. Maybe you were led to believe - or convinced yourself - if you just loved enough, things would improve. Sometimes it even becomes a challenge.⠀
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Take a deep breath and repeat after me: it's not your job to change other people. That's their job, and honestly, they are probably fine - if not happy - with the way they are. Think of it this way, they have a good person (you) pouring all this effort into them. Who wouldn’t like that?⠀
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You can only take people as they are at this minute. They might decide to change some day, but that is their choice. If you can't accept them, you probably don't like them. And that's ok.⠀
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The way I reframe it for my clients is that the foundation for loving people is to wish them well and to not cause them any harm. Full stop. Anything extra you do is because you like them. Save your attention and time for people who treat you with respect; and to advocate for those in need.⠀
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Remember: You deserve to be valued too.⠀
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